Here’s to making big mistakes, y’all!
It’s been a little while since I wrote or updated in here, a month, actually. Last time I posted, I felt so sure that I wasn’t a Dressing Your Truth Type 2 with a Secondary 1. I’d posted a few pictures on some DYT Facebook groups, and the resounding answer was I was a Type 4, probably with a Secondary 2.
Now, I loathe Type 4 style and colors. So I resisted this altogether, and even went so far as to make a HUGE rant on the Type 4 group about what to do when you hate your Type. It began when I had this dream, and in it, I met Carol. She told me in no uncertain terms that I was very obviously a Type 4, and that I ought to just get over it and start Dressing My Truth the right way. The whole thing was very surreal (like dreams tend to be), but very vivid, and almost had the quality of a nightmare. I woke up literally sick to my stomach with anxiety, knowing that I was a Type 4.
So people on Facebook said to me, “Well, a lot of people have resistance to their Type because they have issues they haven’t confronted. However, if it really felt like a nightmare, it’s always possible it really WAS a nightmare, especially if you fear that Carol would Type you as a 4 and you feel the least comfortable as one.”
And I got to thinking about that for a good while.
Truth of the matter is, they were right. I can tell by when I wear Type 4 clothing that it’s so not right for me. The red and black? Good God. I feel so full of anxiety and completely riddled with exhaustion at the same time. A Type 4 should be able to rock that like nobody’s business. And I know for a fact that straight black and white (stark Type 4 color combo that only a 4 can pull off) is SO bad on me!
The big problem I had– and still have, to some degree– is letting other people tell me what my Truth is. Ironically, Carol warns people about this pretty consistently, and even does so right in the DYT free course guidelines.
BIG mistake.
I had to take a real step back and examine what I really need out of this color and style journey. I already know that I’m a Soft Gamine in Kibbe’s style system. I’ve tested it, and it really works. I already know that I…don’t quite fit into sci/art, the way most people would think. I LOOK like I should be a Dark Winter…but the colors are too strong and too saturated. I love to look at it, but on me it doesn’t feel RIGHT. So then that leaves Soft Summer (the only other real match to my coloring)…but I don’t quite seem to be as soft and blended as a typical Soft Summer. I also have more contrast and appear a bit more crisp.
Ahhhh.
Crisp, eh?
And then it starts making sense again. I was leaning Type 4 something or other because I saw what I needed out of clothing styles and thought the word “structured” and the word “clean” and the word “simple”. But those adjectives don’t really define me. Type 4 is structured and clean enough to look fabulous in color blocking. On me, it’s pretty unfabulous. Boring, even.
I needed something more. More…animation? More whimsy? More playfulness? I thought I might need texture, but that was wrong and so Type 3, which I know doesn’t fit me. What I needed was crispness and LIGHTNESS. Lightness is Type ONE.
I keep thinking about my hair and what I need from it to look good and be comfortable. Having long hair is just awful on me. I know my hubby likes and prefers long hair, but he’s going to have to love me without it, because it drags me down, makes me feel depressed, and hides me completely. I become completely lost behind this huge, flat curtain of hair, and frankly, it’s awful. I hate it. I’m not interested in dressing it up in any way. It’s so hard to take care of and maintain, so I throw it up in a ponytail or a bun…and end up looking like a severe, unhappy version of a Type 4. I look severe and unhappy because I am NOT a Type 4, and that’s utterly clear to me now.
What I need out of my hair is LIGHTNESS. I need it to be free, to move, to bounce. Imagine my surprise last summer when I went to the salon to get my hair cut and got this cute layered bob style. All of a sudden, all kinds of movement started happening. All my life I’ve had stick-straight hair. No I don’t! Not at all! When my hair is long (and by long, I mean, anywhere longer than my collarbone), it’s TOO HEAVY for me! I actually don’t have straight hair at all…and if I recall correctly, I’ve seen pictures of me as a little with this super adorable mop of wavy hair. It’s when I start to conform to what others want of me (Dad: “Women should have long hair.”) that I start to lose myself.
Now, I’m still searching for the perfect haircut, and I’m quite a bit overdue. Indeed, I’m at the point already where it’s easier to ponytail it and look like a Four again. Next time, it needs to go a LOT shorter to get it right. I haven’t found the right stylist yet, so hopefully the next one I see (whenever taxes come in; good grief, IRS, get on the ball here!) will do a better job. I fully intend to come armed with lots of photos of hairstyles and a LIST of keywords for the stylist to keep in mind as she’s chopping away at my mop.
Anyway, that was a bit of a segue, wasn’t it? Coming back around to things, I’m sure that a lot of people would read this and think, “Well, with all this need for lightness…are you sure you’re not a Primary Type 1 instead of a 2?” Well, yeah. Yeah, I am sure. Because I know what colors look good on me for a fact, and those are Type 2 colors. I also have the personality traits of a Type 2, think, act, and react like a 2, get emotional like a Type 2, &c. There’s really no getting around it. I know for certain I am a Two. It’s just my Type 1 is so close (and hey, even the Type 4 is pretty close) to the Type 2 that it’s easy to get confused.
So there you have it. My detailed ramble on why I’m a Type Two Secondary One.
Miss Kitty in Color 