Making My Own Way.

I’ve had a few days now to really let the idea that I’m DYT Type 1/2 sink in. I find myself checking in against it often, and I’ve also seen a lot of patterns confirming this type. I’ve questioned it intensely in my mind, because…well, because I can see aspects of myself in ALL of the types.

Why not a primary Type 2? After all, I’m a notorious pile-maker, and I do worry a lot. Also don’t forget the fact that it’s said that one’s emotional reaction is always one’s primary type, so bring on the water works.

But what about Type 3? Lord knows I adore autumn colors and lots and lots of texture. And don’t I tend to have a stubborn, bullish kind of quality sometimes?

Sure, but Type 4. I’m a huge perfectionist. At times in my past, I’ve had people literally compliment me on my enunciation (which I thought was a rather odd compliment, to be sure). And one of my biggest word descriptors is certainly “stupid”…though I don’t know if I just see an extra dose of stupidity living in the city like I do, making it pop out of my mouth so often.

So, yeah. I guess I AM all of the types. And to some degree, that’s true. We ARE all of the types…in degrees. And figuring out the degrees of what is what is super important to me.

Keywords are generalities for sure, but once I sat down with some real honesty I could see that this is the right fit for me, and that a lot of my other behaviors are learned ones due to my difficult upbringing.

The huge problem I come across now is some differences of opinion, and this is the point where I decided I HAVE to diverge and go my own way on the Dressing Your Truth scheme.

The number one disconnect for me is the wearing of gold jewelry and accessories. Sounds kind of lame, I know. But what I do know for a fact is that gold isn’t the greatest on me. I really look good in silver. This, according to some, would kick me off the DYT bandwagon immediately, and though I still have an urge to do it one day, I’m kind of glad that I’ve not spent the money on the actual course. Anyone with some common sense can find out everything they need to know about this system to apply it very effectively to their life.

So what to do about the gold vs. silver debate?

Well. I have decided to keep my silver and continue to omit gold (except for maybe rose gold, though I’ve not tried it yet). At the same time, I know that a Spring type (Type 1) must be light and uplifting. So I will keep my silver BUT also make sure it’s very shiny, and not wear heavy pieces that will drag that energy down. I will also endeavor to ensure that it’s playful and fun.

These earrings are really shiny, not to mention super fun!

Circles in a design, with an opal (which is a very light, airy, and uplifting type of stone to me).

Adding an element of fun and playfulness to jewelry. And what could be more fitting for Ms. Kitty, eh? 🙂

Another problem I’ve had that’s almost as important as the gold vs. silver debate is the colors themselves. When I think of Type 1, this is what comes into my mind:

And oh my gosh. This really feels like too much. I just cannot do these ultra-bright type of colors. I have a literal visceral reaction against them, like I’m nauseated. In fact, even posting that picture on here and looking at it makes me feel a wee bit queasy. So obviously that’s not good.

I don’t want to walk around constantly feeling like I might just throw up at any time. Ha.

I need a little more subtlety to pull off anything remotely Type 1…and realistically, maybe that’s where my secondary Type 2 comes in. In the course, you’re supposed to use Type 1 colors, metals, style, and lines with two or three different secondary Type 2 style elements (in my case, softening up the Type 1 energy a little bit). But I’d like to take it a step further. I’d like to take it here instead:

Still warm, but with lots of gray (Type 2) and more subdued but still cute and feminine.

An all neutral-based Type 1 look I found on pinterest somewhere. This is really doable for me, though it might feel a bit heavy (?).

Type 1 can have a lot of floral, depending on individual preference. I’ve seen a lot of floral patterns that are way too big, but this one is perfect. I’m petite, so I need smaller patterns to not be overwhelmed. Also, I would prefer skinny jeans over bootcut here. Let me add…I will never, EVER go to the acid washed looking jeans shown for Type 1s. I like and prefer dark washed jeans because they look more put together. Always.

Another lighter version, but still staying toward the warmer direction. I hate how this person mixed metals. I hate mixed metals, so that won’t happen. I also hate anything “distressed” and I loathe jean jackets, but everything else is quite nice, as well as being Florida appropriate!

Another mainly neutral type outfit. I’d do the colors well enough, though I would lighten up the cardigan to a lighter fabric. This one feels more Type 3 to me.

Again with the “distressed” jeans! Ugh. You know what makes me really distressed in real life? My clothes with holes in them. No. Just no. Everything else is pretty smashing, but change the metals to shiny silver.

Another neutral type outfit, with fun added. I’ve never worn a tulle skirt before, so I don’t know if I’d like it, but it sure is cute! And that cardigan is fabulous (also circles!).

I absolutely ADORE this sweater/shirt. The skirt is waaaay too short for me, but I could do it if it were modest, or pair with jeans instead. Love the color combination here, and the nod toward Type 2 in the waves (S-curves) on the sweater, then the pearls (circles) on the collar for Type 1. Scallops on the bag as well (half-circles). Cute!

This last one…may be a bit too bright for me. But the general idea I love. Neutral neutral neutral with a pop of color.

Anyway, those are my ideas. I’m going to continue to solidify this idea over pinterest. Follow me there through the link on the top of this blog.

Living As a Type 2…and Got It All Wrong

This is more than an aha moment. This is an epiphany. And it’s really scary for me.

More consideration and more research. More reflection and deep thought about who I am, who I should have been and who I want to be. I’m starting to see where I’ve gotten off track, and maybe some of the reasons why this has happened.

Like I inferred in the last post, my childhood was…difficult, to use a mild word. My parents divorced when I was five, and I was functionally abandoned by my mother. My father did the best he could, but it was not easy for a divorced single father in the 80s. I remember being little and loving to run and play and dance…and being told to settle down. I remember being shamed for my energy and love of life, for wanting to have fun. And over the years, I think that changed me.

I’m not blaming my father. I know he did the best he could under the circumstances. But what was a happy, lovely, bright child became shy and withdrawn, riddled with stomach troubles and massive anxiety.

I realize now that because of the way I was raised, because of expectations that were put upon me, and because I was forced to grow up so fast (and take care of my sister like a mother would, even though she was a mere year younger than I was), my personality was stifled. I became, well…I made myself a Type 2. Because that’s what was expected of me. Because that’s what my father saw (and still sees) as the epitome of womanliness. And what little girl doesn’t want daddy to be proud of her?

It hurts to write about this. It hurts to reflect on the past like this, and mull it over, and share it with the world in this way.

I’ve been living contrary to my nature for a long, loooong time. Almost thirty years of my life. I’ve been living in my secondary Type 2 since I was seven or eight years old. Even thinking about embracing my true self is kind of terrifying. I’m not sure how to get over the negativity associated with it.

No, I’ve never been a Two, though my personality and reactions are very Two. I learned how to be that way, but it’s not who I truly am. It’ll be difficult, but maybe it’s time to embrace the real me.

~*~*~ Things that helped me come to this realization: ~*~*~

Your Body Never Lies!

“Here is a great question someone posted on my Facebook page:

“My sister-in-law and I watched your online course last weekend together and we loved it! Thank you so much! My sister-in-law has the face texture/nose of a Type 3, but she identifies with the personality traits of a Type 4. She chose Type 4 as who she is. What do you do when your physical features and personality traits don’t match up?”

Here is my answer:

Your body never lies.

Your body never lies and we adapt our personality and behavior tendencies to our environment and the people in it. I am a Type 3 with a secondary Type 4 that lived a lot in my 4ness as you will learn when you read my book, It’s Just My Nature!, my body is definitely a Type 3. So by what you are telling me your sister probably is a dominant Type 3 if that is what her body is saying. Read the book and it will help sort it all out!

A quick answer to your question is “it means you have not been living your truth most likely and it’s time to start living it!”

A lot of people are not living their true nature and as a result many things are out of balance in their lives.  Just like in the world of nature if we alter it’s natural expression it goes out of balance and in to disharmony.”

~*~*~

I’m a Type 1. I see it in my face everywhere. I look JUST like all those primary Type 1 women. I see a lot of mannerisms that are the same as theirs.

But this is really scary stuff, folks. This is really and truly earthshaking for me.

I need to give it more consideration, but I think the truth is that I’m not a 2/1 (which is safer, eh?).

I’m a 1/2. Cheerful, bright, happy, animated, with a childlike love of the world and nature, but still soft and gentle and personable. I’m the blower of bubbles and dandelion fluff. The swinger on swings. The skipper down the sidewalk. The lover of sparkles and kitties and birds on the wing. That’s who I was a long time ago. I wonder if it’s not too late to get that back…

I Was Definitely Wrong!

So yesterday I was blogging about how I was unsure of my DYT (Dressing Your Truth) secondary type. It’s something I’ve been having a naturally difficult time with. I really feel like I’ve been overthinking this thing.

But today, I had the opportunity to sit down and just check out some of Carol’s “finding your type” videos…and I’m over the second-guessing.

I’m not a 2/3 at all. I want to be, though, because I love the earthiness and texture they get. It reminds me of nature, which I love. It’s also a good part of the reason why I had such a hard time letting go of the Autumn general seasonal color. It feels natural to me.

But it’s not me.

I’m definitely 2/1.

How do I know this? Well, like I said yesterday, Two as primary is a given for me. The video talking about how we react when emotionally upset or stressed out was very telling. Not only that, but it should also have given me some clues as to the secondary. Yes, I’m very emotional; that’s something I never want to change about me. I cry, I worry endlessly, I get sick to my stomach. All very Type 2.

But the other thing I do? Bury it. I don’t want to talk about it. I want it to go away. And Carol said, clearly, that a Type 1 will straight up say “I don’t want to talk about this right now”. And when I’m upset, that’s how I feel. I’m emotional. I feel like a wreck. I’m crying and feeling like crap…and no, I do not want to talk about it. I just want it to go away. I want to stop dwelling, because I’m never going to regain control of my emotions unless I don’t have to think about it.

All very Type 1, eh?

Not only that, but I see a LOT of One in my face. Here are examples of confirmed Type 1s, along with my own picture (though it’s an old one) for reference.

Versus me:

This is the most telling version where you can see a lot of the “upward movements” the lady on Facebook was talking about. I see the Two in the lips and nose (S-curves), with the heart shaped face Ones have, as well as the “smiling eyes” look, asymmetrical dimples, high forehead, apple cheeks, &c.

Not only that, but a hallmark trait of a Type 1 is that they tend to see themselves in ALL of the types, making it difficult to narrow down which one they are. They’re keeping their options open. Lord knows I did just that. Am I a One? Well, maybe. I seem to have a lot of the physical features. Maybe Two? Oh yes, I’m very emotional. What about Three? I definitely have a good bit of texture in my skin, and I do tend to be very impulsive and sometimes snappish. Four? Sure. I like to be still, quiet, and alone.

And as well as all that? I start a lot of projects but DON’T finish them. This is a One movement, not a Three. I say I get really fired up when I’m talking about something I have passion for (maybe more because I have a lot of Aries in different aspects and less so because it’s a movement of mine…), so fire made me think Three. But really? I get ANIMATED when I talk about something I’m passionate about. And I gesticulate. A lot.

Though I wouldn’t necessarily say that things are “fun” (a Type 1 keyword), I do say “cute” and “adorable” a LOT. And having watched some of the expressions of Type 1 women on some of Carol’s videos, I can see that I do a lot of them…to some degree.

A part of me wonders, even…if things hadn’t gone the way they did in my childhood (I won’t get into it here, because there’s a lot of very personal stuff; suffice it to say that I had a very rough time of things), I kind of wonder if I wouldn’t have always been a primary Type 1 with a 2 secondary. And I wonder if I wouldn’t be happier that way. At the same time, though, I am who I am…now. Not who I could have been had things been different.

But maybe that’s a different subject for another day.

Anyway, I’m convinced.

DYT Type 2/1 it is!

Now to make a pinterest board! Woo!

Another Go At DYT

I made the mistake of looking at my Color & Style pages list on Facebook today, and it led me in a massive segue back into the world of DYT. I don’t necessarily think this is a bad thing, although I will say I’ve been doing it for hours. And I think I had a minor (or MAJOR!) epiphany.

I was looking at secondaries primarily today. It’s easy for me to determine that I’m a primary Type 2. If I had any doubt of it, Carol’s video on youtube regarding How Being Upset Reveals Your True Nature really solidified things for me. Absolutely, no two ways about it…I am definitely a Type 2! If you’re not sure, give that link a clickie. It was extremely helpful for me.

The secondary has been a lot more of a challenge, and truth be told, I’m still kind of up in the air. But there are some things bouncing around in my head that are giving me a few aha moments.

Not all Type 2 feels perfect for me…especially the manner of dressing. I like to look at it. Heck, I LOVE to look at it. But on me…it feels kind of silly. Like, it’s really too much. Too much frilliness, too many scarves. I generally prefer scarves to be, you know, on my head (even if this year I’ve fallen rather far off the bandwagon of head covering…). A bit too neutral, staid, and boring. And I recalled someone commenting on my glasses on Facebook a few months ago.

I need more upward movement.

Huh. Upward is Type 1 or Type 3. I’m not still enough to be a Four anyways (although I CAN be a huge perfectionist). I’ll leave that to the hubby; he’s a Four all the way.

So I dove headfirst into Type 1, because I…just didn’t like the words describing Type 3. I mean, I just don’t like them. And hey! I’m fun! …right? And I am also very youthful, being almost always told I must be around 19 to 22 years old when I am, in fact (gulp!), 34. Makes a lot of sense, right?

But there’s a lot of 1 that just doesn’t feel like me. When I think of a classic Type 1, I think of my old coworker S. She was always on the move, always laughing, everything was always about having a good time. And I do like having a good time. I do. But my idea of a good time doesn’t seem very Type 1-ish.

So I started watching videos regarding secondary energies and how they manifest when socializing. And the one about Type 3 (double gulp!) really resonated with me. I run, run, run, and push myself until I’m exhausted, burst into tears, and withdraw. I feel stress and too much energy physically in my body. My version of working out is hopping on the treadmill with headphones on, listening to music and hitting a comfortably medium-paced walk. I can go like that for hours, and in the past I’ve done it. Even better, a comfortably medium-paced walk through the woods, a la hiking for babies. Yes, that’s me all over.

And then I thought about a lot of my fiery traits, the ones I suppress. All. The. Time. The urge to snap and get irritated. Having grand ideas for this or that, starting huge projects, going on a bender for hours, or days, or weeks…and then never finishing it. Getting the urge to start a journal again, and then letting it peter out after a few days or weeks. Heck, I can’t even manage to write on my blogs consistently (as you can see if you read either of them). All of my energy is in spurts, and I get energy typically and especially in the mid to late morning hours. I expend a ton of energy (in house cleaning, &c.), go for a couple of hours, then run out and need to recuperate.

And in reading up on the four temperaments, I can see easily that I am a phlegmatic/choleric temperament. Phlegmatic is the energy and movement of water (therefore Type 2), while choleric is fire (which relates to Type 3).

So surprise! The type I hated almost more than any other type might very well be my secondary after all! Ha.

So now, I’m going to dig and dig into Type 2/3 and the temperaments, and see how things go. This should be interesting, at the very least…and hopefully very insightful!

Feeling Out Soft Winter (Zyla)

It’s been awhile since I’ve written in here. Lots going on in the ol’ personal life, of course. That hasn’t stopped me from thinking about colors and style at all, though, let me assure you!

Recently, one of the wonderful women on the Facebook color and style groups offered to make vision boards for people, and I asked to be signed up. She did a wonderful, fabulous, AMAZING job…and now I wonder how I could ever have doubted Zyla’s Soft Winter for myself! So much so, I’d be highly surprised if I saw the man myself and got any other answer.

I’m not going to post the entire board, as it’s secret still, but I just waned to share a few of my favorite pins from it. I saw some things in the board that I’m frankly not too surprised about, especially in the colors. I’ve already recently figured out (and making a pinterest on it, of course!) that my primary, best colors are in the split complimentary color scheme. Reds/pinks. Cool greens that go very deep. And the one I struggled with for a long time: purple.

I won’t lie. I love lace. Love love love! I would do this with leggings since it looks well over the knee.

Antique-looking jewelry. I love this purple. I could do it in garnet too, I think (which would be sweet since it’s hubby’s birthstone!).

I must say…I love ankle boots. So hard. And these are adorable. Though I don’t know if I’d be daring enough to do them in purple. Shoes are so expensive when you’re buying good ones. I’d be more likely in real life to buy them in charcoal, so that they match more things. But if money were no object…yes.

I love the idea of a coat with a hood attached. I feel like…when I’m feeling sensitive, I could hide in it.

I just love everything about this dress. In real life, it would drag on the floor soooo much, because I’m super short. But I could hem it. Also adore the slight puff sleeves and the elbow length.

Mary janes? YES. Tights? Double YES!

I love the idea of this. The top may be a bit too revealing for me personally, but I love the drape and the slight asymmetry and the gentle details. I could make this modest enough to wear in real life pretty easily. Also…charcoal. One of my best neutrals.

Love the little nod to the SGness in me. I would absolutely wear this collar.

I love this particularly over the shirt. Looks Edwardian styled, without going into the frilly poet shirt type of thing, which I know is no good on me (and really, I do feel ridiculous in a frilly shirt). This, though…just perfect. Love the sleeves. Love the neckline. Adore that fabric. I feel like my patterns must be kept monochrome, which seems to be a SW thing anyhow. Busy patterns are distracting and overwhelming on me.

One of my personal best colors. Pine green. Love the velvet. I would do this in a longer length, and definitely with both sleeves instead of this asymmetrical type style. That’s all I need, to have one arm be hot, and the other freezing all day! lol

Don’t know if they call this wine or burgundy. I love the color. I love the waist. Love the flow. I’d have to figure out how to cover up my chest and arms…but it would be worth the effort. This is a color I’ve always been a little shy of. I’m always afraid to go too deep, because often deep gets vampy…and while I did a stint playing goth girl in high school, that’s really so not me. So I’m having a difficult time drawing the line between soft enough, deep enough, but not bite your neck enough. Ha.